Let Go. Trust Yourself.

I was reading an article recently that mentioned the great strides that have been made in child psychology, development and parenting during the last 25 years. So out of curiosity, I did a search online to see how many parenting books were currently available—41,918 results came up. I did a similar Google® search on the topic of parenting—there were 57.6 million results. 57.6 million!

While it’s nice to know we have options (!), I think this is an example of too much information being a dangerous thing.

As parents we often find ourselves in uncharted territory and we’re unsure of what to expect or how to handle certain situations. But rather than trust the natural wisdom and intuition that’s built into us, we too quickly look outside ourselves for answers—Google®, the latest parenting book, parenting shows, experts and the media.

Certainly seeking to be knowledgeable as a parent is a good thing. But when the pursuit of this knowledge overwhelms us and causes us to overanalyze and doubt our parenting, we’ve disconnected from our own inner sense of what’s right for ourselves and our families.

In her book A Woman’s Worth, Marianne Williamson notes that “Good parenting is not intellectual as much as emotional and intuitive.” She reminds parents that “we have the intuitive radar to know exactly how to listen to our children, what to say to our children, and how to love our children.” This is wise advice for all of us who have grown up in the Information and Knowledge eras—not everything has an intellectual, logical answer. The ability to trust our gut when it comes to parenting will go a long way in tuning in to our children’s needs.

This intuitive know-how in parenting is no different than the instinctive abilities we know our children have when they are learning new skills. When they are on the verge of taking their first steps and stumbling and fumbling their way to this new skill, we don’t show them videos of other babies walking or refer them to “The Babies’ Guide to Walking.” We just know and trust that they’ll figure it out—in their own way, in their own time. That’s how they build confidence in their abilities and begin to develop a strong sense of self. As parents, it’s important to give ourselves permission to do the same.

We all love our children immensely and we want them to be happy and successful. But we put too much pressure on ourselves to do all the right things and be the perfect parents for our children. Sometimes the best thing we can do for their potential is to let go a little and trust that things will turn out okay.

You have everything you need to be a great parent. So, lighten up! Let go and trust yourself. In the words of the wise Dr. Spock, “You know more than you think you do.”